Affairs of the heart chapter 33

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Anandi didn’t realize when she cried herself to sleep. When she woke up next morning she was still on the couch but a blanket covered her. She got up and started looking around for Shiv.
She found him in his room packing his stuff.

He saw her but continued packing.

“Shiv what’s all this?” She asked

“We are leaving Anandi. I didn’t want to disturb you. You can do your packing too. I want to leave ASAP.
His eyes looked blood shot he had cried too last night.

“Shiv are you ok?”

“I’m fine just want to leave, there’s no point in staying now”.

She understood he was upset and it was better not to bother him.
She went to her room and after freshening up and packing she came out. He was sitting on the sofa looking gloomy.

“We will leave in another 10 mins”.

“What abt breakfast Shiv?”

“I am not hungry. You can have it I will wait”.

“Shiv it’s a long journey and you have to drive. Don’t take out your anger on food.”

He didn’t respond. She ordered room service. She coaxed him to have breakfast and then they left. He reluctantly obliged. She took a last look at their suit. She did have happy memories of it after all.They didn’t speak a word while driving back. The beautiful valleys seemed faded now.

“Shiv please say something”

“What should I say Anandi? I know it’s all over. I was wrong to assume that things can be back to normal. It can’t be. Not after what I did”.

She felt a pang in her heart. Isn’t that what she wanted? So why was she feeling an emptiness inside her.

“Shiv I am sorry. I wanted to tell you but not this way. I lost my cool too.”

“No Anandi don’t be sorry I deserve it.  It was my mistake. My one wrong decision ruined your life. I was trying to save Saanchi’s life but at the cost of what? My own child! I killed one life to save another. I should have listened to my heart instead of giving control to my brain.”.

“Shiv please!! Don’t talk like this. My intention was not to blame you. You did what you thought was right in that situation. You didn’t know even know about the baby even I didn’t know”.

“Can you ever forgive me Anandi?? Can you forget that pain and that sense of betrayal which I gave you? Do you think you can accept me back forgetting everything?”

She thought for a moment “I don’t know Shiv. I am confused about my feeling”.

“Why didn’t you stop me Anandi ? “ He asked

“From what ? “

“From trying to come close to you. Trying to woo you back? “

“I tried Shiv but I failed. I had been trying to hate you for four years but I failed. And I am feeling bad for you. I didn’t mean to hurt you”.

Suddenly he stopped the car angrily.

“No Anandi don’t feel bad for me. Frankly I am a selfish jerk who only thinks if himself. I was selfish four years ago, I chose my family over you I didn’t think for a moment what repercussions you might have to suffer and I am being selfish again by assuming I can get you back. How can I face you Anandi? After what I did. I cant even imagine how much pain and anguish you must have gone through. No Anandi its and unpardonable sin”.

She looked shocked. She didn’t want this ? But then what exactly did she want ? 
She was still hurting from his betrayal but at the same time she craved for him. Imagining her life without him gave her shivers. Last four years of her life had been an empty shell. She was incomplete without him. But why was it so difficult to let go of the past ?

Seeing his grumpy mood she decided it was better to give him some time.Afterall it had been shocking news for him. They barely talked for rest of the journey.

While dropping her home he said “I’m sorry for blackmailing you into coming with me. I won’t bother you again. I don’t deserve you Anandi”.

She started to say “Shiv it’s….”

He didn’t wait for her to complete. She knew he was angry at himself and couldn’t face her. It was better to let him be with himself for some time.
She joined her office next day but didn’t see Shiv in office. She was disturbed but didn’t try to contact him. Next day again Shiv was missing from office. For no reason at all she feeling restless as if something bad was about to happen. She had to see him somehow.

 She contacted his PA and came to know he was not keeping well and had remained shutting in his hotel room ever since he was back. After office she reached his hotel and rushed to his suit.

She knocked on his door she heard his hoarse voice “who is this?”

“Shiv it’s me Anandi please open the door”

He opened the door but stared at her in surprise “what happened Anandi. You came here so suddenly?”

She didn’t hear his question she was busy looking at him. He looked terrible. Dark circles encircled his eyes and he looked pale.

“Are you ok Shiv?” She asked as she came in.

“I am ok Anandi its just little throat infection….probably I caught some chill in Coorg. Why are you here Anandi?”

“Because I was worried for you. I was not having a good feeling and you indeed look terrible. Did you see a doctor?”

“I am fine Anandi I have lot of pending work so decided to do it from here itself”.

She didn’t listen to him and touched his cheeks then throat he was too tall for her to reach his forehead.

“You are burning with fever Shiv !!” She almost screamed.

“Anandi it’s nothing I am ok…”He coughed.

“Come with me” She took his burning arms and dragged him to his bedroom.

He kept on protesting. Ignoring his feeble protests she made him lie on the bed and searched around for a thermometer. After a while she checked his temperature it was 101F

“Shiv since when do you have fever?? Did u see a doctor?? Why didn’t you tell me or ur PA ??”

“Anandi its nothing. I will be fine” He started to get up. She pushed him back and said in a stern voice

“In case you have forgotten how stubborn I can be then let me remind you. You are not leaving this bed till you are ok. And you will do exactly what I say from  now on else you know how strict I can be”.

In spite of his gloomy mood his lips twitched into a smile “Ok I will do as you say Anandi”.

It was a funny scene a girl half his size was dominating him. But then she always had the power to wind him around her little finger.

She turned around to make a call to the hotel reception.

“Why are you doing this Anandi?”

“Doing what?”

“Trying to help me”

“Because I wont let you kill yourself” She replied and called reception.

 TBC…

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13 Responses to Affairs of the heart chapter 33

  1. Hema Menon says:

    Most awaited update Neha… Brilliantly expressed.

    I am feeling the same pain.

    Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone

  2. Yas says:

    Awesome one Louise…..he is shattered….me like it

  3. kamal says:

    Seriously,I can feel the pain of shiv.Thanks a lot dear for the update.INSTITUTE am addicted to it,atleast one update a day,must say u have a beautiful writing skill.

  4. Zarqa says:

    I’m feeling so bad for Shiv tho he deserves it…well sorta kinda…ok he deserves to suffer but still not so much I feel really bad for him 😦
    Pleeeeaasseeeeee continue soon neha!!!!

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